I am made all things to all men.
Author: Bible

The man who in view of gain thinks of righteousness; who in the view of danger is prepared to give up his life; and who does not forget an old agreement however far back it extends - such a man may be reckoned a complete man.
Author: Confucius

The market can stay irrational longer than you can stay solvent.
Author: John Maynard Keynes

The meanest, most contemptible kind of praise is that which first speaks well of a man, and then qualifies it with a "but".
Author: Henry Ward Beecher

The meek shall inherit the earth? Well... I don't think so. If by meek you mean friendly and introverted, okay maybe, but if by meek you mean unwilling to take a chance, then never. If I was a betting man and I had to wager on who I thought would inherit
Author: Jim Coudal

A little girl and a little boy were at day care one day. The girl approaches the boy and says, "Hey Tommy, wanna play house?" He says, "Sure! What do you want me to do?" The girl replies, "I want you to communicate your thoughts." "Communicate my thoughts?" said a bewildered Tommy. "I have no idea what that means." The little girl smirks and says, "Perfect. You can be the husband."
This is the joke from a category: Marriage jokes

A guy is down on his luck. He takes his last $500 and goes to Las Vegas. Overnight, he has a fantastic run of luck. He stumbles out of the casino and finds a pay phone. He calls his wife and says, "Honey, pack your bags. I just won over a million dollars in Vegas." His wife say, "That's wonderful. What should I pack for...Europe, the Carribean?" He says, "I don't care, just be gone when I get home."
This is the joke from a category: Marriage jokes

A husband and wife went to the fairgrounds. The wife wanted to go on the Ferris wheel, but the husband wasn't comfortable with that. So the wife went on the ride by herself. The wheel went round and round and suddenly the wife was thrown out and landed in a heap at her husband's feet. "Are you hurt?" he asked. "Of course I'm hurt!" she replied. "Three times around and you didn't wave once!"
This is the joke from a category: Marriage jokes

A man happened to meet his ex-wife at a party, and after a few drinks, he suggested that they might have another try at marriage. His ex-wife sneered in reply, "Over my dead body !" He downed his drink and replied, "Well, I see you haven't changed one little bit."
This is the joke from a category: Marriage jokes

A lady with a large flowery hat was stopped at the church door by the usher. "Are you a friend of the bride ?" he asked. "Certainly not," she snapped, "I'm the groom's mother."
This is the joke from a category: Marriage jokes