Things are seldom what they seem, skim milk masquerades as cream.
Author: W. S. Gilbert

Things that are done, it is needless to speak about...things that are past, it is needless to blame.
Author: Confucius

It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it.
Author: Sam Levenson

Man has six organs to serve him and he is master only of three. He cannot control his eye, ear or nose, but he can his mouth, hand and foot.
Author: Leone Levi

Poetry is the record of the best and happiest moments of the happiest and best minds.
Author: Percy Bysshe Shelley

What part of a football pitch smells nicest? The scenter spot!
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes

Which England player keeps up the fuel supply? Paul gas coin!
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes

What do you get if you drop a piano on a team's defence? A flat back four!
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes

Our team is doing so badly that "Manager of the Month" isn't an award. It's an appointment!
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes

What are Brazilian fans called? Brazil nuts!
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes