Best quotes to send by SMS
Bible They reel to and fro, and stagger like a drunken man, and are at their wit's end.
Author: Bible

Ellen DeGeneres They say you just stand over there, he'll say thank you and you walk back off and that's what I thought was gonna happen, but in my head, I had for five or six years known that he was gonna call me over.
Author: Ellen DeGeneres

John Dryden They think too little who talk too much.
Author: John Dryden

Sir Thomas More They wonder much to hear that gold, which in itself is so useless a thing, should be everywhere so much esteemed, that even men for whom it was made, and by whom it has its value, should yet be thought of less value than it is.
Author: Sir Thomas More

Adrienne E. Gusoff Things could always be worse; for instance, you could be ugly and work in the Post Office.
Author: Adrienne E. Gusoff

The best jokes to send by SMS
Space jokes Two aliens landed in the remote countryside and went walking from the flying saucer along a narrow lane. The first thing they saw was a red pillar box. `Take us to your leader,' said the first alien. `Don't waste time talking to him. Can't you see he's only a child?' said the second alien.
This is the joke from a category: Space jokes

Space jokes What does an astronaut do when he gets angry? He blasts off:
This is the joke from a category: Space jokes

Snowman jokes Why was the snowman's dog called Frost? Because Frost bites.
This is the joke from a category: Snowman jokes

Space jokes Why did the boy become an astronaut ? Because he was no earthly good !
This is the joke from a category: Space jokes

Space jokes What do you call a loony spaceman ? An astronut !
This is the joke from a category: Space jokes