I tend to live in the past because most of my life is there.
Author: Herb Caen

This art of resting the mind and the power of dismissing from it all care and worry is probably one of the secrets of energy in our great men.
Author: Captain J. A. Hadfield

This does not make the authors of those narratives liars; it makes them servants of fallible human memory and perception.
Author: Tom Bissell

This is my answer to the gap between ideas and action - I will write it out.
Author: Hortense Calisher

This is patently absurd; but whoever wishes to become a philosopher must learn not to be frightened by absurdities.
Author: Bertrand Russell

Where do footballers dance? At a football!
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes

There was a Packers fan with a really crappy seat at Lambeau. Looking with his binoculars, he spotted an empty seat on the 50-yard line. Thinking to himself "what a waste" he made his way down to the empty seat. When he arrived at the seat, he asked the man sitting next to it, "Is this seat taken?" The man replied, "This was my wife's seat. She passed away. She was a big Packers fan." The other man replied,"I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. May I ask why you didn't give the ticket to a friend or a relative?" The man replied, "They're all at the funeral."
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes

Q: How does Stan Collymore change a lightbulb? A: He holds it in the air, and the world revolves around him
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes

Q: Four Dallas Cowboys in a car, who's driving? A: The police.
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes

A couple of old guys were golfing when one said he was going to Dr. Taylor for a new set of dentures in the morning. His friend remarked that he had gone to the same dentist a few years before. "Is that so?" the first said. "Did he do a good job?" "Well, I was on the course yesterday when the fellow on the ninth hole hooked a shot," he said. "The ball most have been going 200 mph when it hit me in the stomach. That," he added, "was the first time in two years my teeth didn't hurt."
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes