Best Cell Phones

Like as the waves make towards the pebbled shore, So do our minutes hasten to their end.
Author: William Shakespeare

Listen. Do not have an opinion while you listen because frankly, your opinion doesnt hold much water outside of Your Universe. Just listen. Listen until their brain has been twisted like a dripping towel and what they have to say is all over the floor.
Author: Hugh Elliott

Literature is an occupation in which you have to keep proving your talent to people who have none.
Author: Jules Renard

Living in a vacuum sucks.
Author: Adrienne E. Gusoff

Living well is the best revenge.
Author: George Herbert

How many pilots does it take to change a light bulb? None, it is done by the automatic pilot.
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

Pilot: Tower, there's a runway light burning. Tower: I'm sure there must be dozens of lights burning. Pilot: Sorry, I mean it's smoking.
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

Tower: Hawk 20, is this the same aircraft declaring emergency about two hours ago ? Pilot: Negativ, Sir. It's only the same pilot.
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

A military cargo plane, flying over a populated area, suddenly loses power and starts to nose down. The pilot tries to pull up, but with all their cargo, the plane is too heavy. So he yells to the soldiers in back to throw things out to make the plane lighter. They throw out a pistol. "Throw out more!" shouts the pilot. So they throw out a rifle. "More!" he cries again. They heave out a missile, and the pilot regains control. He pulls out of the dive and lands safely at an airport. They get into a jeep and drive off. Pretty soon they meet a boy on the side of the road who's crying. They ask him why he's crying and he says "A pistol hit me on the head!" They drive more and meet another boy who's crying even harder. Again they ask why and the boy says, "A rifle hit me on the head!" They apologize and keep driving. They meet a boy on the sidewalk who's laughing hysterically. They ask h im, "Kid, what's so funny?" The boy replies, "I sneezed and a house blew up!"
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

A man jumps out of an airplane with a parachute on his back. As he's falling, he realizes hiss chute is broken. He doesn't know anything about parachutes, but as the earth rapidly approaches, he realizes his options are limited; he takes off the parachute and tries to fix it himself on the way down. The wind is ripping past his face, he's dropping like a rock, and at 5000 feet, another man goes shooting up past him. In desperation, the man with the chute looks up and yells, "Hey do you know anything about parachutes?!" The guy flying up looks down and yells, "No, do you know anything about gas stoves?!"
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes