
If men will not be governed by God, they will be ruled by tyrants.
Author: William Penn
It is folly for an eminent person to think of escaping censure, and a weakness to be affected by it. All the illustrious persons of antiquity, and indeed of every age, have passed through this fiery persecution. There is no defense against reproach but ob
Author: Joseph Addison
It's a poor sort of memory that only works backward.
Author: Lewis Carroll
It's a sign of mediocrity when you demonstrate gratitude with moderation.
Author: Roberto Benigni
It's all right to have butterflies in your stomach. Just get them to fly in formation.
Author: Dr. Rob Gilbert

Q: How did the dinosaur feel after he ate a
pillow?
A: Down in the mouth!
This is the joke from a category: Dinosaur jokes
The officer shouted orders to a nearby soldier.
With considerable
bravery, the GI ran directly onto the field of
battle, in the line of
fire, to retrieve a dispatch case from a dead
soldier. In a hail of
bullets, he dove back to
safety.
"Private," the officer said, "I'm recommending you for a medal. You
risked your life to save the locations of our secret
warehouses."
"Warehouses?" the private shouted. "I thought you said
whorehouses!"
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes
Regardless of what you may hear, there's still
many women
these days
who are excellent "housekeepers". Seems
each time they get a divorce,
they keep the house.
This is the joke from a category: Divorce jokes
The surgeon told his patient that woke
up after
having been operated: "I'm afraid we're going to have to
operate you
again. Because, you see, I forgot my rubber gloves
inside you."
"Well, if it's just because of them, I'd rather pay
for them if you
just leave me alone."
This is the joke from a category: Doctor and nurse jokes
A man is
walking down the street when he hears
a voice, "Pssst you come over
here!" He looks round and can see no
one but an old mangy greyhound.
"yes over here!" Said the greyhound
"Look at me I'm tied up here, I
should be racing I won 14 races in
my carrer you know?" The man thought
to himself "Oh my god a
talking dog, I have to have it, it will make
me rich, tv appearances
cabaret bookings" So he goes in search of the
owner.
He found
the owner and said "I'd like to buy your dog, is he for
sale??" The
owner says "No mate you don't want that old moth eaten
thing!"
"But I do!" Insisted the man "I'lll give you 1000 pounds for
him. "Ok
said the owner but I think your making a big mistake!" Handing
over
the money the man said "Why do you think that?" The man replied
"Because that dogs a bloody liar it's never won a race in it's
life!"
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes