Best Cell Phones

Children should be educated and instructed in the principles of freedom.
Author: John Adams

Christmas is a time when people of all religions come together to worship Jesus Christ.
Author: Matt Groening

Civilization begins with order, grows with liberty, and dies with chaos.
Author: Will Durant

Civilization is the art of living in towns of such size the everyone does not know everyone else.
Author: Julian Jaynes

Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune.
Author: Kin Hubbard

A man got on a plane and sat next to a blonde, after sitting for awhile she sneezed, took out a tissue and whipped her box. The man not knowing her said nothing and went about his business. After about 3 or 4 minutes she sneezed again and, the same thing, whipped her box. Finally, the man got the nerve and asked "what was wrong?" She said that every time she sneezes she has an orgasm. "Oh!" the man said, are you taking anything for it? "Yes", she said - "black pepper!"
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

A blonde and a brunette were talking. The brunette complained, "Everytime my boyfriend brings home flowers, I have to to spend the weekend with my legs in the air." The blonde asks, "Don't you have a vase?"
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Question: What's another name for pickled bread? Answer: Dill-dough.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Question: Why do men always give their penis a name? Answer: Because they don't want a stranger making 95 percent of their decisions for them.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Q: How do you embarrass an archeologist? A: Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes