Best Cell Phones

Thankfully, beauty is easier to remove than apply, and a swipe of demaquillage in the right direction and you are you once again.
Author: Margaret Cho

That action is best which procures the greatest happiness.
Author: Francis Hutcheson

That consciousness is everything and that all things begin with a thought. That we are responsible for our own fate, we reap what we sow, we get what we give, we pull in what we put out. I know these things for sure.
Author: Madonna

It is a truth universally acknowledged that as soon as one part of your life starts looking up, another falls to pieces.
Author: Helen Fielding

That you may retain your self-respect, it is better to displease the people by doing what you know is right, than to temporarily please them by doing what you know is wrong.
Author: William J. H. Boetcker

What are the four food groups? For bachelors: Fast, Frozen, Junk and Spoiled. For drinkers: Malt, Hops, Barley and Yeast. For heavies: Caffeine, Fat, Sugar, Chocolate.
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

What sort of soup do skeletons like? One with plenty of body in it.
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

What is small, furry and smells like bacon? A hamster.
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

Why did your brother give up his job in the biscuit factory? Because he went crackers.
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes