Best Cell Phones

[Water is] the only drink for a wise man.
Author: Henry David Thoreau

A bad beginning makes a bad ending.
Author: Euripides

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
Author: Mark Twain

A bird that you set free may be caught again, but a word that escapes your lips will not return.
Author: Jewish Proverb

A book holds a house of gold.
Author: Chinese Proverb

A group of goose biologists were meeting to brainstorm about the migration tactics of Canada geese. They were particularly interested in applying for a $100,000 Federal grant to investigate the "V" formation of goose flight. It had been observed that one side of the "V" is always longer than the other side. This group would put together a research proposal to apply for the $100,000 grant and hopefully find out why this happens. To start off the discussion, Todd, the Consulting Firm Biologist stands up and says in typical consultant fashion, "I say we ask for $200,000, and attempt to model the wind drag coefficients. We can have our geologists record and map the ground topography and then our staff meteorologists can predict potential updraft currents. Our internal CAD department can then produce 3-d drawings of the predicted wing tip vortices. Then, after several years of study, our in-house publications department could produce a nice thick report full of charts and graphs." The Senior Research Biologist, a professor at the local university, cleared his throat and responded, "No, no!, That's not it at all. We only need $150,000. We can train a group of domesticated geese to fly in formations of equal length and then compare their relative fitness to wild geese. We can then publish the results in the Journal of Wildlife Management. About then, the hardworking field biologist stands up and begins walking for the door. "Where are you going?" the group asks. "I'm leaving" he replies, "I've heard enough. No one has to give me $100,000 to find out that the reason one side of the "V" is longer is simply because there are more damn geese on that side!"
This is the joke from a category: Biologist jokes

A couple of biologists had twins. One they called John and the other control.
This is the joke from a category: Biologist jokes

How do you identify a bald eagle? All his feathers are combed over to one side.
This is the joke from a category: Bird jokes

What do you call a woodpecker with no beak ? A headbanger !
This is the joke from a category: Bird jokes

Where do birds meet for coffee ? In a nest-cafe !
This is the joke from a category: Bird jokes