Best Cell Phones

Nancy Reagan fell down and broke her hair.
Author: Johnny Carson

Nay, tempt me not to love again: There was a time when love was sweet; Dear Nea! had I known thee then, Our souls had not been slow to meet! But oh! this weary heart hath run So many a time the rounds of pain, Not even for thee, thou lovely one! Wo
Author: Sir Thomas More

Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves.
Author: William Pitt

Neither have they hearts to stay. Nor wit enough to run away.
Author: Samuel Butler

In every generation there has to be some fool who will speak the truth as he sees it.
Author: Boris Pasternak

Q: Why don't blondes eat Jelly? A: They put tacks in their shoulder pads.
This is the joke from a category: Blonde jokes

Did you hear why they closed the Seattle Kingdom? While the crowd was doing the wave, two blondes drowned.
This is the joke from a category: Blonde jokes

A blonde decides to learn and try horse back riding unassisted without prior experience or lessons. She mounts the horse with great effort, and the tall, shiny horse springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. Out of shear terror, she grabs for the horse's mane but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup. She is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground again and again. As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousn ess or even death when Frank, the Wal-Mart manager runs out to shut the horse off.
This is the joke from a category: Blonde jokes

Did you hear about the blonde who after watching the ballerinas, wondered why they didn't get taller girls?
This is the joke from a category: Blonde jokes

A blonde calls her husband at work one day and asks him, "Can you help me when you get home?" "Sure," he replies. "What's the problem?" "Well, I started a really hard puzzle and I can't even find the edge pieces." "Look on the box," he said. "There's always a picture of what the puzzle is." "It's a big rooster," she said. The husband arrives home and tells his blonde wife, "Okay, put the corn flakes back in the box."
This is the joke from a category: Blonde jokes