Best Cell Phones

In addition to my other numerous acquaintances, I have one more intimate confidant. My depression is the most faithful mistress I have known -- no wonder, then, that I return the love.
Author: Soren Kierkegaard

In all the affairs of life, social as well as political, courtesies of a small and trivial character are the ones which strike deepest to the grateful and appreciating heart.
Author: Henry Clay

In America, through pressure of conformity, there is freedom of choice, but nothing to choose from.
Author: Peter Ustinov

In democracy it's your vote that counts; In feudalism it's your count that votes.
Author: Mogens Jallberg

In every American there is an air of incorrigible innocence, which seems to conceal a diabolical cunning.
Author: A. E. Housman

How is a telephone like a dirty bathtub? They both have rings!
This is the joke from a category: Telephone jokes

How can you tell if someone who's just had a perm is on the phone? You get a frizzy signal!
This is the joke from a category: Telephone jokes

How does a baritone make phone calls? Song distance!
This is the joke from a category: Telephone jokes

A psychiatrist was testing the mentality of a patient. "Do you ever hear voices without being able to tell who is speaking or where the voices are coming from?" asked the psychiatrist. "As a matter of fact, I do," said the patient. "And when does this happen?" asked the psychiatrist. "Oh," said the patient, "when I answer the telephone."
This is the joke from a category: Telephone jokes

How that we are engaged I hope you'll give me a ring. Of course. What's your phone number ?
This is the joke from a category: Telephone jokes