Best Cell Phones

I don't own a cell phone or a pager. I just hang around everyone I know, all the time. If someone wants to get ahold of me, they just say "Mitch," and I say "what?" and turn my head slightly.
Author: Mitch Hedberg

No one who cannot rejoice in the discovery of his own mistakes deserves to be called a scholar.
Author: Donald Foster

If we don't change direction soon, we'll end up where we're going.
Author: Professor Irwin Corey

The best teacher is the one who suggests rather than dogmatizes, and inspires his listener with the wish to teach himself.
Author: Edward Bulwer-Lytton

Today is the day in which to express your noblest qualities of mind and heart, to do at least one worthy thing which you have long postponed.
Author: Grenville Kleiser

Why did some snakes disobey Noah when he said "Go forth and multiply" ? They couldn't, they were adders !
This is the joke from a category: Snake jokes

Did you hear about the stupid snake? He lost his skin.
This is the joke from a category: Snake jokes

Why did a anowman send his father to Siberia? Because he wanted frozen pop !
This is the joke from a category: Snowman jokes

What do snowmen eat for lunch ? Icebergers !
This is the joke from a category: Snowman jokes

What two letters of the alphabet do snowmen prefer ? I.C. !
This is the joke from a category: Snowman jokes