Best Cell Phones

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to.
Author: Joe Gores

I'm a bit of an abstract figure that people can project their fantasies on; it's pretty much what we all are, otherwise we wouldn't be stars, and people wouldn't be interested. But people project things on you that have nothing to do with what you really
Author: Salma Hayek

On the whole human beings want to be good, but not too good, and not quite all the time.
Author: George Orwell

Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back into the same box.
Author: Italian Proverb

It is the cause, not the death, that makes the martyr.
Author: Napoleon Bonaparte

Q: Why are people in Arkansas having peanut butter and jelly for Thanksgiving this year? A: Because they can't afford any more pork.
This is the joke from a category: Clinton jokes

Bill Clinton and Al Gore go into a local diner for lunch. As they read the menu the waitress comes over and askes Clinton, "Are you ready to order?" Clinton replies, "Yes, I'd like a quickie." "A quickie?!?" the waitress replies. "Sir, given the current situation of your personal life I don't think that is a good idea. I'll come back when you are ready to order from the menu." She walks away. Gore leans over to Clinton and says, "It's pronounced Quiche."
This is the joke from a category: Clinton jokes

Q: What does Clinton do to lose weight? A: Runs away from the draft.
This is the joke from a category: Clinton jokes

Q: Why is Bill Clinton called "middle of the road Democrat"? A: Because he's got a wide yellow stripe down the middle of his two-lane back.
This is the joke from a category: Clinton jokes

Q: Why is Bill Clinton diverting federal funds from improving schools to improving jails? A: Because when his term is through, he won't be going to school.
This is the joke from a category: Clinton jokes