Best Cell Phones

Man is by nature a political animal.
Author: Aristotle

In the absences of a decent time machine, fiction remains the most sturdy vehicle for visiting other eras.
Author: Tom Nolan

Properly, we should read for power. Man reading should be man intensely alive. The book should be a ball of light in one's hand.
Author: Ezra Pound

If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It's the worry that gets you, not the loss of sleep.
Author: Dale Carnegie

Put more trust in nobility of character than in an oath.
Author: Solon

Q. What has seventy-five balls and screws old ladies? A. Bingo!
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Q: Why are cowgirls bowlegged? A: Cowboys like to eat with their hats on.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Q: Define Transvestite: A: A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Q: What did Bill Clinton say to Monica? A: I told you to lick my erection, not wreck my election.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

This guy goes to the zoo one day. While standing in front of the gorilla's cage, a gust of wind swept some dust into his eye. As he rubbed his eyelid, the gorilla went crazy, bent open the bars, and beat the guy senseless. When the guy came to his senses, he reported the incident to the zookeeper. Nodding, the zookeeper explained that pulling down your eyelid means "F**k you!" in gorilla language. The explanation didn't make the victim feel any better and he vowed revenge. The next day he purchased two large knives, two party hats, two party horns, and a large sausage. Putting the sausage in his pants, he hurried to the zoo and over to the gorilla's cage, where he tossed a hat, a knife, and a party horn. Knowing that gorillas were natural mimics, he put on a party hat. The gorilla looked at him, looked at the hat, and put it on. Next, he picked up his horn and blew on it. The gorilla picked up his horn and did the same. Then the man picked up his knife, whipped the sausage out of his pants, and sliced it in half. The gorilla looked at the knife, looked at his own crotch, looked at the man, and pulled down his eyelid.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes