Best Cell Phones

Why dost thou gaze upon the sky? O that I were yon spangled sphere! Then every star should be an eye, To wander o'er thy beauties here.
Author: Sir Thomas More

It's in the homes of spiteful old widows that one finds such cleanliness.
Author: Fyodor Dostoevsky

Why was I born with such contemporaries?
Author: Oscar Wilde

Win hearts, and you have all men's hands and purses.
Author: William Cecil Burleigh

In my Father's house are many mansions.
Author: Bible

Which birds steal soap from the bath ? Robber ducks !
This is the joke from a category: Bath jokes

Mrs Saggy: Mrs Wrinkly tried to have a facelift last week. Mrs Baggy: Tried to? Mrs Saggy: Yes, they couldn't find a crane strong enough to lift her face!
This is the joke from a category: Beauty jokes

I've just come back from the beauty parlour. Pity it was closed!
This is the joke from a category: Beauty jokes

What happened when the witch went for a job as a TV presenter? The producer said she had the perfect face for radio.
This is the joke from a category: Beauty jokes

A woman went to a sweet store to buy some sweets. The boy behind the counter said "Gosh, your ugly aren't you?, I've never seen anyone so hideous as you before" "Young man" she replied. " I didn't come here to be insulted" "Really", he said, "Where do you usually go ?"
This is the joke from a category: Beauty jokes