Best Cell Phones

There are two kinds of men who never amount to much: those who cannot do what they are told and those who can do nothing else.
Author: Cyrus H. Curtis

There are two motives for reading a book: one, that you enjoy it; the other, that you can boast about it.
Author: Bertrand Russell

There are two types of people--those who come into a room and say, 'Well, here I am!' and those who come in and say, 'Ah, there you are.'
Author: Frederick L Collins

There are women who are for all your 'times of life.' They're the most wonderful sort.
Author: Henry James

There but for the grace of God go [I].
Author: John Bradford

Why did the rabbit have trouble hopping? Because he always kept one foot in his pocket for good luck!
This is the joke from a category: Rabbit jokes

Q. Did you hear the Energizer Bunny Was Arrested? R. Charged With Battery!
This is the joke from a category: Rabbit jokes

O'Toole worked in the lumber yard for twenty years and all that time he'd been stealing the wood and selling it. At last his conscience began to bother him and he went to confession to repent. "Father, it's 15 years since my last confession, and I've been stealing wood from the lumber yard all those years," he told the priest. "I understand my son," says the priest. "Can you make a Novena?" O'Toole said, "Father, if you have the plans, I've got the lumber."
This is the joke from a category: Religious jokes

Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible? A. David's Triumph was heard throughout the land.
This is the joke from a category: Religious jokes

Q. How did Adam and Eve feel when expelled from the Garden of Eden? A. They were really put out.
This is the joke from a category: Religious jokes