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Anger as soon as fed is dead - 'Tis starving makes it fat.
Author: Emily Dickinson

Anger is a signal, and one worth listening to.
Author: Harriet Lerner

Anger makes dull men witty, but it keeps them poor.
Author: Elizabeth I

Animals are such agreeable friends - they ask no questions, they pass no criticisms.
Author: George Eliot

Another flaw in the human character is that everybody wants to build and nobody wants to do maintenance.
Author: Kurt Vonnegut

Dilmer, six-foot-three, two hundred eighty pounds, was thrown from his seat when the Southern Railway train he was riding derailed. The giant teenager flew a dozen feet through the air before hitting headfirst against a steel partition. For a moment Dilmer lay dazed, rubbing his head. The conductor came by and kneeled down beside him. "Don't move!" said the conductor. "We've called an ambulance." "Naw," said the boy, getting to his feet. "I ain't hurt so bad. That steel wall musta broke my fall!"
This is the joke from a category: Car and train jokes

Jill's car was unreliable and she called John for a ride every time it broke down. One day John got yet another one of those calls. "What happened this time?" he asked. "My brakes went out," Jill said. "Can you come to get me?" "Where are you?" John asked. "I'm in the drugstore," Jill responded. "And where's the car?" John asked. Jill replied, "It's in here with me."
This is the joke from a category: Car and train jokes

Personally, I like to stay and read the credits. When the last scene of Titanic faded to black and people began rushing for the exits, I shouted: "Quick! There are only enough cars in the parking lot for half of us!"
This is the joke from a category: Car and train jokes

Who drives away all his customers ? A taxi driver.
This is the joke from a category: Car and train jokes

What do you call a pig who's been arrested for dangerous driving ? A road hog !
This is the joke from a category: Car and train jokes