Best Cell Phones

Pardon one offense, and you encourage the commission of many.
Author: Publilius Syrus

Partying is such sweet sorrow.
Author: Robert Byrne

Pathos, piety, courage, they exist, but are identical, and so is filth. Everything exists, nothing has value.
Author: E. M. Forster

Patience serves as a protection against wrongs as clothes do against cold. For if you put on more clothes as the cold increases, it will have no power to hurt you. So in like manner you must grow in patience when you meet with great wrongs, and they will
Author: Leonardo da Vinci

Irony is the hygiene of the mind.
Author: Princess Elizabeth Asquith Bibesco

A chemist, a shopkeeper and a teacher were sentenced to death by firing squad. The chemist was taken from his cell and as the soldiers took aim he shouted "Avalanche!" The soldiers panicked and in the confusion the chemist escaped. The shopkeeper was led out next. As the soldiers took aim he shouted "Flood!" and escaped. The teacher was then lead out. The squad took aim and the teacher, remenbering how the other two had escaped, shouted "Fire!"
This is the joke from a category: Dead and dying jokes

What kind of ghosts haunt operating theatres? Surgical spirits.
This is the joke from a category: Dead and dying jokes

Vampire 1: "I once went so long without fresh blood that I nearly died." Vampire 2: "How awful!" Vampire 1: "Yes. Fortunately, I found some in the neck of time."
This is the joke from a category: Dead and dying jokes

Why did the cowboy die with his boots on ? Because he didn't want to stub his toe when he kicked the bucket !
This is the joke from a category: Dead and dying jokes

Q: What is the definition of Death? A: When you stop paying taxes suddenly.
This is the joke from a category: Dead and dying jokes