Best Cell Phones

Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage.
Author: Publilius Syrus

My life is very crazy and busy, but I love it that way.
Author: Hilary Duff

My mind to me a kingdom is, Such present joys therein I find, That it excels all other bliss.
Author: Sir Edward Dyer

I can't give you a sure-fire formula for success, but I can give you a formula for failure: try to please everybody all the time.
Author: Herbert Bayard Swope

My own suspicion is that the universe is not only queerer than we suppose, but queerer than we *can* suppose.
Author: J. B. S. Haldane

What sort of a car has your dad got? I can't remember the name. I think it starts with T. Really - Ours only starts with gas.
This is the joke from a category: Car and train jokes

Learner driver: What happens when everything's coming your way? Instructor: You're in the wrong lane.
This is the joke from a category: Car and train jokes

A motorist ran into a shop. "Do you own a black and white cat?" he asked. "No," replied the manager. "Oh dear," said the motorist, "I must have run over a nun."
This is the joke from a category: Car and train jokes

Which snakes are found on cars? Windscreen vipers.
This is the joke from a category: Car and train jokes

Policeman: Are you going to a fire? Motorist: No, I'm trying to prevent one. That's what my boss said would happen if I were late again.
This is the joke from a category: Car and train jokes