Best Cell Phones

If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It's the worry that gets you, not the loss of sleep.
Author: Dale Carnegie

Put more trust in nobility of character than in an oath.
Author: Solon

Quarrel not at all. No man resolved to make the most of himself can spare time for personal contention.
Author: Abraham Lincoln

It is better wither to be silent, or to say things of more value than silence. Sooner throw a pearl at hazard than an idle or useless word; and do not say a little in many words, but a great deal in a few.
Author: Pythagoras

Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body.
Author: Sir Richard Steele

A guy calls up his ex-wife and, disguising his voice, asks to speak to himself. "Sorry, he doesn't live here anymore, we're divorced!" Next day, the guy does the same thing with the same results. He does this everyday for a week, and finally his ex-wife realizes who it is that keeps calling. "Look, Bozo! We're divorced! Finito! End of story! When are you going to get that through your fat head?" "Oh, I know! I just can't hear it enough!"
This is the joke from a category: Divorce jokes

Doctor, Doctor I think I'm suffering from Deja Vu! Didn't I see you yesterday?
This is the joke from a category: Doctor and nurse jokes

Doctor these pills you gave me for BO... What's wrong with them? They keep slipping out from under my arms!
This is the joke from a category: Doctor and nurse jokes

Doctor, Doctor I keep getting pains in the eye when I drink coffee Have you tried taking the spoon out?
This is the joke from a category: Doctor and nurse jokes

Doctor, Doctor will this ointment clear up my spots? I never make rash promises!
This is the joke from a category: Doctor and nurse jokes