Best Cell Phones

Proverbs are all very fine when there's nothing to worry you, but when you're in real trouble, they're not a bit of help.
Author: L. M. Montgomery

How do you tell a communist? Well, it's someone who reads Marx and Lenin. And how do you tell an anti-Communist? It's someone who understands Marx and Lenin.
Author: Ronald Reagan

Put yourself on view. This brings your talents to light.
Author: Baltasar Gracian

Rachel weeping for her children, and would not be comforted, because they are not.
Author: Bible

Rarely do great beauty and great virtue dwell together.
Author: Petrarch

A married couple is driving down the interstate doing 55 mph. The husband is behind the wheel. His wife looks over at him and says, "Honey, I know we've been married for 15 years, but, I want a divorce." The husband says nothing but slowly increases speed to 60 mph. She then says, "I don't want you to try to talk me out of it, because I've been having an affair with your best friend, and he's a better lover than you." Again the husband stays quiet and just speeds up as he clenches his hands on the wheels. She says, "I want the house." Again the husband speeds up, and now is doing 70 mph. She says, "I want the kids too." The husband just keeps driving faster, and faster, until he's up to 80 mph. She says, "I want the car, the checking account, and all the credit cards too." The husband slowly starts to veer toward a bridge overpass piling, as she says, "Is there an ything you want?" The husband says, "No, I've got everything I need right here." She asks, "What's that?" The husband replies just before they hit the wall at 90 mph, "I've got the airbag!"
This is the joke from a category: Divorce jokes

A ninety-year-old couple decide to get a divorce. They go to the judge and say, "Judge, we want a divorce." The judge says, "You've been married 70 years and now you want to get a divorce? Why did you wait so long?" The couple say in unison, "Well, we wanted to wait until the kids were dead."
This is the joke from a category: Divorce jokes

Question: What's the major cause of divorce? Answer: Once is not enough.
This is the joke from a category: Divorce jokes

Doctor, Doctor I've got wind! Can you give me something? Yes - here's a kite!
This is the joke from a category: Doctor and nurse jokes

Doctor, Doctor everyone keeps throwing me in the garbage. Don't talk rubbish!
This is the joke from a category: Doctor and nurse jokes