Best quotes to send by SMS

Never take the advice of someone who has not had your kind of trouble.
Author: Sidney J. Harris
I detest that man who hides one thing in the depths of his heart, and speaks for another.
Author: Homer
Nice guys finish last, but we get to sleep in.
Author: Evan Davis
Ninety-eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hard-working, honest Americans. It's the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then--we elected them.
Author: Lily Tomlin
If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else.
Author: Booker T. Washington
The best jokes to send by SMS

What can Santa give away and still keep?
A cold.
This is the joke from a category: Christmas jokes
What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus?
Crisp Cringle.
This is the joke from a category: Christmas jokes
Which of Santa's reindeers needs to mind
his
manners the most?
"Rude"olph
This is the joke from a category: Christmas jokes
What is the difference between the Christmas
alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
The Christmas alphabet has
NO EL.
This is the joke from a category: Christmas jokes
"Why did your boyfriend return his Christmas
tie?" "He said it was too tight."
This is the joke from a category: Christmas jokes