Best Cell Phones

Joy is not in things; it is in us.
Author: Richard Wagner

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped.
Author: Sam Levenson

Speak no evil of an absent friend. (Non male loquare absenti amico)
Author: Titus Maccius Plautus

Speech is the mirror of the mind. (Imago Animi Sermo Est)
Author: Seneca

Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush.
Author: Doug Larson

Q: Why did the Canadian cross the road? A: He saw some American do it on TV.
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

Canada, in view of recent events, will be changing the maple leaf on the flag to a marijuana plant. That way, the people of Quebec will have good reason to burn the flag.
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

Q: Did you know they are taking out all the K-Marts in Afghanistan? A: They are putting in TARGETS!!!
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

Q: Where does an Irish person go on a vacation? A: A new bar
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

The Englishman's, Irishman's and Scotsman's wives go shopping one day to a big department store. While they are there a fire breaks out. Everyone in the store is killed, including the three women. Their husbands are summoned to the local police station where a policewoman breaks the news to them: "I'm afraid sirs, that we believe your wives were killed in the fire at the department store. However the fire was so intense we cannot identify the bodies. Only their handbags survived the blaze. Can you identify your wives' handbags from these three found in the store?" The three men all look at the handbags and each one is able to identify one of the handbags as belonging to his wife. With all handbags accounted for the policewoman leaves the men to deal with their grief in peace. The three men sit in silence for a while, then the Englishman opens his wife's handbag and rummages through the conte nts, finally pulling out a half-empty packet of cigarettes and says "All these years married and I never knew the old girl smoked." The Scotsman looks into his wife's handbag and pulls out a half-empty bottle of scotch. "Jings, I knew her all that time an ah didnae ken ma missus drank." The Irishman empties his wife's handbag onto the floor, looks through the contents and picks up a half empty packet of condoms. "'Saints preserve us! All dese years an oi never knew me wife was a man."
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes