Best Cell Phones

I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead.
Author: Samuel Goldwyn

How much time he saves who does not look to see what his neighbor says or does or thinks.
Author: Marcus Aurelius Antoninus

While there's life, there's hope.
Author: Cicero

Pray you now, forget and forgive.
Author: William Shakespeare

Who has a harder fight than he who is striving to overcome himself.
Author: Thomas a Kempis

Marley stopped at the town barbershop for a haircut. After thirty-five minutes of snipping and cutting, the barber held a mirror behind Marley's head. "How you like it?" asked the barber. "Real fine," said the redneck. "But how 'bout making it a little longer in the back?"
This is the joke from a category: Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!

There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Divorce Barbie ...includes the house, the car, and half of Ken's belongings
This is the joke from a category: Barbie doll jokes

There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Biker Barbie ...complete with leathers and tattoos
This is the joke from a category: Barbie doll jokes

There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Venus de Milo Barbie ...made of rock; no head, no arms
This is the joke from a category: Barbie doll jokes

There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Junkie Barbie ...complete with needle tracks
This is the joke from a category: Barbie doll jokes