
When a friend is in trouble, don't annoy him by asking if there is any thing you can do. Think up something appropriate and do it.
Author: Edgar Watson Howe
When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: 'Whose?'
Author: Don Marquis
When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty.
Author: George Bernard Shaw
Not until just before dawn do people sleep best; not until people get old do they become wise.
Author: Chinese Proverb
When all is said and done, the weather and love are the two elements about which one can never be sure.
Author: Alice Hoffman

What should you do if you find a witch in your bed?
Run!
This is the joke from a category: Bed jokes
Did you hear about the vampire bicycle
that
went round biting people's arms off?
It was a vicious cycle.
This is the joke from a category: Bicycle jokes
A
biologist was interested in studying how
far bullfrogs can jump. He
brought a bullfrog into his laboratory,
set it down, and commanded, "Jump,
frog, jump!"
The frog jumped
across the room.
The biologist measured the distance, then noted in
his journal, "Frog
with four legs jumped eight feet."
Then
he cut the frog's front legs off. Again he ordered, "Jump, frog,
jump!"
The frog struggled a moment, then jumped a few feet.
After
measuring the distance, the biologist noted in his journal,
"Frog
with two legs jumped three feet."
Next, the biologist cut off the
frog's back legs. Once more, he
shouted, "Jump, frog,
jump!"
The frog just lay there.
"Jump, frog, jump!" the biologist
repeated.
Nothing.
The biologist noted in his journal, "Frog with no legs -
lost its
hearing."
This is the joke from a category: Biologist jokes
Q: What is a crowbar?
A: A place were crows go
to get a drink!
This is the joke from a category: Bird jokes
Johnny was racing
around the garden on his
new bicycle and called out to his mother to
watch his tricks.
'Look, Mum! No hands! Look, Mum! No feet! Waaah! Look, Mum! No
teeth!'
This is the joke from a category: Birthday jokes