Best quotes to send by SMS
Henry David Thoreau If you would convince a man that he does wrong, do right. But do not care to convince him. Men will believe what they see. Let them see.
Author: Henry David Thoreau

Thomas Secker If you would not step into the harlot's house, do not go by the harlot's door.
Author: Thomas Secker

George Eliot Ignorance gives one a large range of probabilities.
Author: George Eliot

John Selden Ignorance of the law excuses no man: Not that all men know the law, but because 'tis an excuse every man will plead, and no man can tell how to refute him.
Author: John Selden

Oliver Goldsmith Ill fares the land, to hast'ning ill a prey, Where wealth accumulates, and men decay; Princes and Lords may flourish, or may fade: A breath can make them, as a breath has made; but a bold peasantry, their country's pride, When once destroyed can neve
Author: Oliver Goldsmith

The best jokes to send by SMS
Dog jokes A man and his dog went into a pub. The barman said "Sorry mate no dogs allowed in here!" The dog said "Oh please don't be like that, I'm trained and I won't cause any trouble!" The bar man was astonished at the talking dog and sat and chatted with the dog and it's owner. After a while the owner went to the toilet and the barman saw his chance for a prank. He said to the dog "Would you do me a favor as a wind up, will you go down to my friends bakers shop and order a loaf of bread??" "Sure!" Replied the dog. The bar man gave the dog a fiver and the dog left. When the owner came out of the toilet he went into a panic when he saw his dog had gone. The barman said "It's ok he's gone down to the bakery for me" The owner was livid "It IS NOT OK he's never been out on his own, anything could happen to him he could get run over. The owner spent the next hour searching for his dog, walking the str eets frantically. As he was walking he heard strange noises coming from an ally way, he went down and there was his dog having it's wicked way with a lady poodle. "ROVER!" Shouted the owner "You've had me worried sick, what's the matter with you you've never dissapeared like this before!" The dog replied "I've never had a fiver before!"
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes

E-mail jokes Why do church bells never send e-mails? They'd rather give each other a ring.
This is the joke from a category: E-mail jokes

Easter jokes Did you hear about the lady whose house was infested with Easter eggs? She had to call an eggs-terminator!
This is the joke from a category: Easter jokes

Elephant jokes What do you call an elephant that flies ? A jumbo jet !
This is the joke from a category: Elephant jokes

Face jokes Fred: You have the face of a saint. Jill: Really? Which one? Fred: A Saint Bernard.
This is the joke from a category: Face jokes