Best Cell Phones

Attempt easy tasks as if they were difficult, and difficult as if they were easy; in the one case that confidence may not fall asleep, in the other that it may not be dismayed.
Author: Baltasar Gracian

Avarice, envy, pride, Three fatal sparks, have set the hearts of all On Fire.
Author: Dante Alighieri

Bad is never good until worse happens.
Author: Danish Proverb

Barnum was wrong - it's more like every 30 seconds.
Author: Unknown

Basic research is what I am doing when I don't know what I am doing.
Author: Wernher von Braun

Q: What has Clinton done that no one has been able to do in the last 5 years? A: Unite the Republican Party.
This is the joke from a category: Clinton jokes

Q: What is the difference between Bill Clinton and Elvis? A: Elvis was drafted and served proudly in the Army.
This is the joke from a category: Clinton jokes

Why is Chelsea Clinton growing up a confused child? Because dad can't keep his pants on and mom wants to wear them.
This is the joke from a category: Clinton jokes

Last summer, the President and Mrs. Clinton were vacationing in their home state of Arkansas. On a venture one day, they stopped at a service station to fill up the car with gas. It seemed that the owner of the station was once Hillary's high school love. They exchanged hellos, and went on their way. As they were driving on to their destination, Bill put his arm around Hillary and said, "Well, honey, if you had stayed with him, you would be the wife of a service station owner today." She smirked and replied, "No, if I had stayed with him, he would be President of the United States."
This is the joke from a category: Clinton jokes

Professor: Heavens! Someone stole my wallet! Wife: Didn't you feel a hand in your pocket? Professor Yes, but I thought it was mine!
This is the joke from a category: College jokes