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Best quotes to send by SMS
Keeping your clothes well pressed will keep you from looking hard pressed.Author: Coleman Cox
Know, first, who you are; and then adorn yourself accordingly.Author: Epictetus
Knowledge can be communicated, but wisdom cannot. A man can find it, he can live it, he can be filled and sustained by it, but he cannot utter or teach it.Author: Hermann Hesse
Knowledge, if it does not determine action, is dead to us.Author: Plotinus
Language exerts hidden power, like a moon on the tides.Author: Rita Mae Brown
The best jokes to send by SMS
The Lone Ranger and Tonto
walked into a bar one day and sat down to drink a beer. After a few
minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said, "Who owns the big
white
horse outside?" The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gunbelt,
and said,
"I do. Why?"
The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger
and said, "I just thought you
would like to know that your horse is
just about dead outside!!" The Lone
Ranger and Tonto rushed outside
and, sure enough, Silver was about dead
from heat exhaustion. The
Lone Ranger got him some water and made him
drink it, and soon
Silver was starting to feel a little better.
The Lone Ranger turned
to Tonto and said, "Tonto, I want you to run
around Silver and see
if you can create enough of a breeze to make him
start to feel
better."
Tonto said, "Sure Kemosabe", and took off running circles
around
Silver. Not able to do anything else but wait, the Lon
e Ranger returned to
the bar to finish his drink.
A few
minutes later, another cowboy struts into the bar and announces,
"Who
owns that big white horse outside?"
The Lone Ranger stands
again and claims, "I do. What is wrong with him
this time?"
The
cowboy says to him, "Nothing much, I just wanted you to
know............ you left your Injun running!!!"This is the joke from a category: Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!
Twenty-four hours in a
day... twenty-four
beers in a case... coincidence?This is the joke from a category: Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!
A man walks into a bar and
asks for
six shots of vodka. The bartender says, "Six shots? What's
wrong?"
"I found out my older brother is gay," replied the
man.
The next night, he walked into the bar again and asked for six
shots of
vodka. "What now?" asked the bartender.
"I found out
my younger brother is gay," replied the man.
The night after
that, the man walked into the bar again and asked for
six shots of
vodka. "Geez, does ANYBODY in your family like women?"
asked the
bartender.
The man replied, "Yeah, my wife does."This is the joke from a category: Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!
WARNING: consumption of
alcohol may make you think you are
whispering when you are not.This is the joke from a category: Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!
WARNING: consumption of
alcohol is the leading cause of pregnancy in the
world. Proceed with
caution.This is the joke from a category: Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!