Best quotes to send by SMS
Coleman Cox Keeping your clothes well pressed will keep you from looking hard pressed.
Author: Coleman Cox

Epictetus Know, first, who you are; and then adorn yourself accordingly.
Author: Epictetus

Hermann Hesse Knowledge can be communicated, but wisdom cannot. A man can find it, he can live it, he can be filled and sustained by it, but he cannot utter or teach it.
Author: Hermann Hesse

Plotinus Knowledge, if it does not determine action, is dead to us.
Author: Plotinus

Rita Mae Brown Language exerts hidden power, like a moon on the tides.
Author: Rita Mae Brown

The best jokes to send by SMS
Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun! The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a bar one day and sat down to drink a beer. After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said, "Who owns the big white horse outside?" The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gunbelt, and said, "I do. Why?" The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger and said, "I just thought you would like to know that your horse is just about dead outside!!" The Lone Ranger and Tonto rushed outside and, sure enough, Silver was about dead from heat exhaustion. The Lone Ranger got him some water and made him drink it, and soon Silver was starting to feel a little better. The Lone Ranger turned to Tonto and said, "Tonto, I want you to run around Silver and see if you can create enough of a breeze to make him start to feel better." Tonto said, "Sure Kemosabe", and took off running circles around Silver. Not able to do anything else but wait, the Lon e Ranger returned to the bar to finish his drink. A few minutes later, another cowboy struts into the bar and announces, "Who owns that big white horse outside?" The Lone Ranger stands again and claims, "I do. What is wrong with him this time?" The cowboy says to him, "Nothing much, I just wanted you to know............ you left your Injun running!!!"
This is the joke from a category: Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!

Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun! Twenty-four hours in a day... twenty-four beers in a case... coincidence?
This is the joke from a category: Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!

Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun! A man walks into a bar and asks for six shots of vodka. The bartender says, "Six shots? What's wrong?" "I found out my older brother is gay," replied the man. The next night, he walked into the bar again and asked for six shots of vodka. "What now?" asked the bartender. "I found out my younger brother is gay," replied the man. The night after that, the man walked into the bar again and asked for six shots of vodka. "Geez, does ANYBODY in your family like women?" asked the bartender. The man replied, "Yeah, my wife does."
This is the joke from a category: Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!

Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun! WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
This is the joke from a category: Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!

Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun! WARNING: consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of pregnancy in the world. Proceed with caution.
This is the joke from a category: Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!