Best Cell Phones

Barnum was wrong - it's more like every 30 seconds.
Author: Unknown

Basic research is what I am doing when I don't know what I am doing.
Author: Wernher von Braun

Be a good listener. Your ears will never get you in trouble.
Author: Frank Tyger

Be aware that a halo has to fall only a few inches to be a noose.
Author: Dan McKinnon

Be careful that victories do not carry the seed of future defeats.
Author: Ralph W. Sockman

How do you get a Texas Tech senior's eyes to sparkle? Shine a flashlight in his ears.
This is the joke from a category: College jokes

How many Buckeye football players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But he gets three hours credit.
This is the joke from a category: College jokes

How does a New York University psychology major turn on his lights in the morning? By opening the car door.
This is the joke from a category: College jokes

Three students from Michigan State, the University of Kentucky and Texas A & M on summer vacation in France were caught smuggling cocaine and sentenced to death by guillotine. The judge turned to the boy from Michigan and asked, "Do you have any final words, son?" "Yeah, drop dead!" snapped the Wolverine. Hearing this, the judge signaled for the sentence to be carried out. The executioner pulled the lever, and as the crowd gaped in astonishment, the giant blade came to a screeching halt three inches from the victim's throat. "It's God's will! Let him go!" cried the judge. Next the fella from U. of Kentucky was put on the block, and the judge asked again, "And what are your final remarks, my boy?" "Go to hell!" shouted the student, and the judge signaled. The razor-sharp blade fell and miraculously stopped just a quarter inch from the condemned boy's neck. "It's the wi ll of God!" exclaimed the judge. "Set him free!" Finally the Texan was put into position. "Before you're beheaded," said the judge, "do you have any last words?" "Yeh!" replied the Aggie. "If y'all will just put a little more grease on them grooves, the blade'll come down a whole lot easier!"
This is the joke from a category: College jokes

Professor: I forgot to take my umbrella this morning. Wife: When did you first miss it, dear? Professor: When I reached up to close it after the rain had stopped.
This is the joke from a category: College jokes