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I simply cannot understand the passion that some people have for making themselves thoroughly uncomfortable and then boasting about it afterwards.
Author: Patricia Moyes

I stand in awe of my body.
Author: Henry David Thoreau

I take it as a man's duty to restrain himself.
Author: Lois McMaster Bujold

I think on-stage nudity is disgusting, shameful and damaging to all things American. But if I were 22 with a great body, it would be artistic, tasteful, patriotic and a progressive religious experience.
Author: Shelley Winters

I think that anyone who comes upon a Nautilus machine suddenly will agree with me that its prototype was clearly invented at some time in history when torture was considered a reasonable alternative to diplomacy.
Author: Anna Quindlen

Three Pastors from the south were having lunch in a diner. One said, "Ya know, since summer started I've been having trouble with bats in my loft and attic at church. I've tried everything-noise, spray, cats-nothing seems to scare them away. Another said, "Yea, me too. I've got hundreds living in my belfry and in the attic. I've even had the place fumigated, and they won't go away." The third said, "I baptized all mine, and made them members of the church... Haven't seen one back since!"
This is the joke from a category: Religious jokes

Q. How do you make holy water? A. Boil the hell out of it.
This is the joke from a category: Religious jokes

Why was the restaurant called "Out of this World"? Because it was full of Unidentified Frying Objects.
This is the joke from a category: Restaurant jokes

Patron 1: I eat at a different restaurant every day. Patron 2: I don't tip, either.
This is the joke from a category: Restaurant jokes

What does a Chinese restaurant serve for Easter? Coloured eggrolls!
This is the joke from a category: Restaurant jokes