Best quotes to send by SMS

The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer.
Author: Victor Borge
The duke had a mind that ticked like a clock and, like a clock, it regularly went cuckoo.
Author: Terry Pratchett
The emotional, sexual, and psychological stereotyping of females begins when the doctor says, 'It's a girl.'
Author: Shirley Chisholm
I am against using death as a punishment. I am also against using it as a reward.
Author: Stanislaw J. Lec
Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperatelly? I say that what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down.
Author: Russell Baker
The best jokes to send by SMS

PE Teacher: Why did you kick that ball
straight at the school computer?
Pupil: You told me to put it in the
Net.
This is the joke from a category: Internet jokes
How do you fix a broken website?
With
stick e-tape.
This is the joke from a category: Internet jokes
What do you call an Internet mystery?
An
e-nigma.
This is the joke from a category: Internet jokes
Who is the most popular
wizard on the
Internet?
Har e-potter.
This is the joke from a category: Internet jokes
George W. Bush is seen crossing the Potomac
river on foot.
The Washington Post : "President Bush crosses the
Potomac River".
The Washington Time : "Bush's conservative approach
saves taxpayers a
boat".
Mother Jones : "Bush can't swim".
This is the joke from a category: Journalist jokes