Best Cell Phones

I think people that have a brother or sister don't realize how lucky they are. Sure, they fight a lot, but to know that there's always somebody there, somebody that's family.
Author: Trey Parker and Matt Stone

I think that God in creating Man somewhat overestimated his ability.
Author: Oscar Wilde

I thought ten thousand swords must have leaped from their scabbards to avenge even a look that threatened her with insult. But the age of chivalry is gone.
Author: Edmund Burke

I tore myself away from the safe comfort of certainties through my love for the truth; and truth rewarded me.
Author: Simone de Beauvoir

I used to dread getting older because I thought I would not be able to do all the things I wanted to do, but now that I am older I find that I don't want to do them.
Author: Nancy Astor

Father: Don't you think our son gets his brains from me? Mother: Probably, dear. I still have all of mine.
This is the joke from a category: Parent jokes

Son: What is an autobiography? Father: Er, the story of an automobile.
This is the joke from a category: Parent jokes

Down at the office Bostwick boasted to one of his buddies, "My son Arthur is smarter even than Abraham Lincoln. Arthur could recite the Gettysburg Address when he was ten years old. Lincoln didn't say it till he was fifty!"
This is the joke from a category: Parent jokes

Bentley and his wife and son were sitting at the dinner table when the boy suddenly blurted out, "Gee, you're dumb, Mom. You don't know anything." "Now, son," scolded Bentley, "you musn't be picky about your mother's little faults."
This is the joke from a category: Parent jokes

Dad: Why is your January report card so bad ? Son: Well, you know how it is. Things are always marked down after Christmas !
This is the joke from a category: Parent jokes