Best Cell Phones

Murphy Brown is doing better than I am. At least she knows she still has a job next year.
Author: Dan Quayle

In summer, the song sings itself.
Author: William Carlos Williams

My country owes me nothing. It gave me, as it gives every boy and girl, a chance. It gave me schooling, independence of action, opportunity for service and honor. In no other land could a boy from a country village, without inheritance or influential frie
Author: Herbert Hoover

Most people have seen worse things in private than they pretend to be shocked at in public.
Author: Edgar Watson Howe

My father used to say, 'Let them see you and not the suit. That should be secondary.'
Author: Cary Grant

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a computer? A: You only have to punch information into a computer once. Q: What's the Blonde's cheer? A: " I'm blonde, I'm blonde, I'm B.L.O.N....ah, oh well.. I'm blonde, I'm blonde, yea yea yea..."
This is the joke from a category: Blonde jokes

Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Ask her to alphabetize a bag of M&Ms.
This is the joke from a category: Blonde jokes

Q: Did you hear about the blonde coyote? A: Got stuck in a trap, chewed off three legs and was still stuck.
This is the joke from a category: Blonde jokes

A blonde suspects that her boyfriend is cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment that same day, with the gun in hand. Sure enough, when she opens the door, she finds her boyfriend in the arms of a redhead. She points the gun at her boyfriend at stares him down for a moment. Then, suddenly, she's overcome with grief, so she puts the gun up to the side her head. Her boyfriend screams, "Honey, don't do it..." The blonde yells back, "Shut up! You're next!"
This is the joke from a category: Blonde jokes

Q. Why was the blonde in the tree? A. Because she was raking up the leaves!
This is the joke from a category: Blonde jokes