Best quotes to send by SMS

If for a tranquil mind you seek,
These things observe with care:
Of whom you speak, to whom you speak,
And how, and when and where.
Author: Anonymous
If God lived on earth, people would break his windows.
Author: Jewish Proverb
If I take refuge in ambiguity, I can assure you that it's quite conscious.
Author: Frank Boyden
I might repeat to myself slowly and soothingly, a list of quotations beautiful from minds profound - if I can remember any of the damn things.
Author: Dorothy Parker
If living conditions don't stop improving in this country, we're going to run out of humble beginnings for our great men.
Author: Russell P. Askue
The best jokes to send by SMS

How did the footbal pitch end up as triangle
?
Somebody took a corner !
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes
What tea do footballers drink ?
Penaltea !
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes
If you have a referee in football, what do you
have in bowls ?
Cornflakes !
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes
Where do spiders play their FA Cup final
?
Webley stadium !
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes
Manager: I thought I told you to lose weight.
What
happened to your three week diet ?
Player: I finished it in
three days !
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes