Best Cell Phones

When one admits that nothing is certain one must, I think, also admit that some things are much more nearly certain than others.
Author: Bertrand Russell

When people do not respect us we are sharply offended; yet deep down in his private heart no man much respects himself.
Author: Mark Twain

When Solomon said there was a time and a place for everything he had not encountered the problem of parking his automobile.
Author: Bob Edwards

Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things
Author: Bible

Son, always tell the truth. Then you'll never have to remember what you said the last time.
Author: Sam Rayburn

What is even bigger than an elephant ? A giant !
This is the joke from a category: Ant jokes

What kind of ant is good at maths ? An accountant !
This is the joke from a category: Ant jokes

Two boys were eating a snack lunch in the school yard. One had an apple and the other said, "Watch out for worms won't you!" The first one replied, "Why should I? They can watch out for themselves."
This is the joke from a category: Apple jokes

How does an apple a day keep the doctor away? When you take careful aim.
This is the joke from a category: Apple jokes

If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, what does an onion do? Keeps everyone away.
This is the joke from a category: Apple jokes