Best Cell Phones

Millions of words are written annually purporting to tell how to beat the races, whereas the best possible advice on the subject is found in the three monosyllables: 'Do not try.'
Author: Dan Parker

I see my body as an instrument, rather than an ornament.
Author: Alanis Morissette

Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate one another.
Author: H. L. Mencken

I still need more healthy rest in order to work at my best. My health is the main capital I have and I want to administer it intelligently.
Author: Ernest Hemingway

Modesty is a shining light; it prepares the mind to receive knowledge, and the heart for truth.
Author: Madam Guizot

What kind of bird lays electric eggs ? A battery hen !
This is the joke from a category: Bird jokes

What happens when geese land in a volcano ? They cook their own gooses !
This is the joke from a category: Bird jokes

What do confused owls say? Too-whit-to-why?
This is the joke from a category: Bird jokes

What do you get if you cross a giant, hairy monster with a penguin? I don't know but it's a very tightfitting tuxedo.
This is the joke from a category: Bird jokes

Did you hear about the chicken that wanted to take ballet lessons? "He wanted to be a hentertainer."
This is the joke from a category: Bird jokes