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Tell it not in Gath; publish it not in the streets of Ashkelon
Author: Bible

I'd rather get my brains blown out in the wild than wait in terror at the slaughterhouse.
Author: Craig Volk

Thanks to the Interstate Highway System, it is now possible to travel from coast to coast without seeing anything.
Author: Charles Kuralt

No one has ever had an idea in a dress suit.
Author: Sir Frederick G. Banting

Pain nourishes courage. You can't be brave if you've only had wonderful things happen to you.
Author: Mary Tyler Moore

A new chef from India was fired a week after starting the job. He keep favoring curry.
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

Sign in restaurant window: "Eat now - Pay waiter."
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

An elderly couple were killed in an accident and found themselves being given a tour of heaven by Saint Peter. "Here is your oceanside condo, over there are the tennis courts, swimming pool, and two golf courses. If you need any refreshments, just stop by any of the many bars located throughout the area." "Heck, Gloria," the old man hissed when Saint Peter walked off, "we could have been here ten years ago if you hadn't heard about all that stupid oat bran, wheat germ, and low-fat diets!"
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

A man went into a deli shop and took a seat at the lunch counter. "Give me a corned beef sandwich," he ordered. "Corned beef sandwich is not on the menu, but I can give you a sandwich with corned beef in it, like our Midnight Special." "What's a Midnight Special?" "A triple decker with corned beef, tongue, bologna, tomato, lettuce, onion, pickle and mayonnaise, on toasted raisin bread." "Could you just place a piece of corned beef between two slices of white bread and serve it to me on a plate?" "Why, sure!" Then, turning to the sandwich man, he sang out: "One Midnight Special. Make it one deck, hold the tongue, bologna, tomato, lettuce, onion, pickle and mayonnaise, and make the raisin bread white, untoasted!"
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

What is the title of the new Vietnamamese cookbook ? 100 way to wok your dog.
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes