Best quotes to send by SMS

USA Today has come out with a new survey - apparently, three out of every four people make up 75% of the population.
Author: David Letterman
Men who are unhappy, like men who sleep badly, are always proud of the fact.
Author: Bertrand Russell
Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.
Author: Matt Groening
Perhaps too much of everything is as bad as too little.
Author: Edna Ferber
I made my mistakes, but in all my years of public life, I have never profited from public service. I've earned every cent. And in all of my years in public life I have never obstructed justice. And I think, too, that I can say that in my years of public l
Author: Richard M. Nixon
The best jokes to send by SMS

Yo mama so short she has to use a
ladder
to pick up a dime.
This is the joke from a category: Yo momma jokes
Yo mama so ugly they didn't give her a
costume when she
tried out for Star Wars.
This is the joke from a category: Yo momma jokes
Yo mama
so ugly when she walks down the
street in September, people say "Wow,
is it Halloween already?"
This is the joke from a category: Yo momma jokes
Yo mama so ugly even Rice Krispies won't
talk to her!
This is the joke from a category: Yo momma jokes
Yo mama so old I told her to act her own age,
and she
died.
This is the joke from a category: Yo momma jokes