Best quotes to send by SMS
Sir Arthur Eddington The mathematics is not there till we put it there.
Author: Sir Arthur Eddington

J. Paul Getty The meek shall inherit the Earth, but not its mineral rights.
Author: J. Paul Getty

H. L. Mencken The men the American public admire most extravagantly are the most daring liars; the men they detest most violently are those who try to tell them the truth.
Author: H. L. Mencken

Seneca The mind is slow to unlearn what it learnt early.
Author: Seneca

Horace Mann Resolve to edge in a little reading every day, if it is but a single sentence. If you gain fifteen minutes a day, it will make itself felt at the end of the year.
Author: Horace Mann

The best jokes to send by SMS
Marriage jokes A bum asks a man for $2. The man asked, "Will you buy booze?" The bum said, "No." The man asked, "Will you gamble it away?" The bum said, "No." Then the man asked, "Will you come home with me so my wife can see what happens to a man who doesn't drink or gamble?"
This is the joke from a category: Marriage jokes

Marriage jokes Two men are having an awfully slow round of golf because the two ladies in front of them managed to get into every sand trap, lake, and rough on the course, and they didn't bother to wave the men on through, which is proper golf etiquette. After two hours of waiting and waiting, one man said, "I think I'll walk up there and ask those gals to let us play through." He walked out to the fairway, got halfway to the ladies, stopped, turned around and came back, explaining, "I can't do it. One of those women is my wife and the other is my mistress. Maybe you'd better go talk to them." The second man walked toward the ladies, go halfway there and, just as his partner had done, stopped, turned around and walked back. He smiled sheepishly and said, "Small World!"
This is the joke from a category: Marriage jokes

Marriage jokes A guy is dating three women and can't decide which one to marry. He gives each $1,000 to see how well they can manage money. The first one spends $800 and puts $200 in the bank. The second one spends $200 and puts $800 in the bank. The third one puts the whole $1,000 in the bank. Which one does he end up marrying? The most beautiful one..
This is the joke from a category: Marriage jokes

Marriage jokes I've never been much on fashion, but got quite a few compliments on a new sports jacket I wore to work one day. My secretary asked me where I got it and I told her that it was a surprise from my wife. I went home early yesterday, and there it was, on the back of a kitchen chair.
This is the joke from a category: Marriage jokes

Marriage jokes The Yuppie showered a Yuppette with gifts for over a month. He took her to fancy restaurants and expensive resorts. Finally, he proposed, "Bernie, if you will marry me, I have enough money to provide you with anything your little heart desires." "Sorry John." she replied. "I'm not ready to settle down yet. And besides, you can't buy my love, but if the price is right, I might see my way clear to rent you some."
This is the joke from a category: Marriage jokes