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I don't need a baby growing inside me for nine months. For one thing, there's morning sickness. If I'm going to feel nauseous and achy when I wake up, I want to acheive that state the old fashioned way: getting good and drunk the night before.
Author: Ellen DeGeneres

The surprising thing about young fools is how many survive to become old fools.
Author: Doug Larson

The tendinous part of the mind, so to speak, is more developed in winter; the fleshy, in summer. I should say winter had given the bone and sinew to literature, summer the tissues and the blood.
Author: John Burroughs

Tell me what you eat, and I will tell you what you are.
Author: Anthelme Brillat-Savarin

The thing I hate about an argument is that it always interrupts a discussion.
Author: G. K. Chesterton

Knock Knock Who's there ! Beethoven ! Beethoven who ? Beethoven is too hot !
This is the joke from a category: Music jokes

Why did they arrest the musician? He got into treble.
This is the joke from a category: Music jokes

Q: What do you get if you cross a lamp with a violin? A: You get light music.
This is the joke from a category: Music jokes

Did you hear about the classical pianist who was not a good speller? When she went out to buy something she left a sign on her door that said: "Out Chopin. Be Bach in a minuet"
This is the joke from a category: Music jokes

Q.How is a heart like a musician? A.They both have a beat :)
This is the joke from a category: Music jokes