Best Cell Phones

...probably the greatest concentration of talent and genius in this house except for perhaps those times when Thomas Jefferson ate alone.
Author: John F. Kennedy

[Feminism is] a socialist, anti-family, political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians.
Author: Pat Robertson

[Medicine is] a collection of uncertain prescriptions the results of which, taken collectively, are more fatal than useful to mankind.
Author: Napoleon Bonaparte

[Spring is] a true reconstructionist.
Author: Henry Timrod

[The pamphlet] was very patriotic. That is, it talked about killing foreigners.
Author: Terry Pratchett

Who's the aardvark's favorite female vocalist? Bearbara Streis-ant!
This is the joke from a category: Aardvark jokes

What command does the aardvark give most often when he sails? Snout about!
This is the joke from a category: Aardvark jokes

What has 200 legs, 50 noses, and is very loud? A herd of stampeding aardvarks!
This is the joke from a category: Aardvark jokes

What do you call an aardvark that's been thrown out of a pub? A barredvark!
This is the joke from a category: Aardvark jokes

What do you call a thick-skinned aardvark? A hardvark!
This is the joke from a category: Aardvark jokes