Best Cell Phones

A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions.
Author: Wilson Mizner

A finished person is a boring person.
Author: Anna Quindlen

A fool's brain digests philosophy into folly, science into superstition, and art into pedantry. Hence University education.
Author: George Bernard Shaw

A friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
Author: Anonymous

A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend-and he's a priest.
Author: Erma Bombeck

LH741: Tower, give me a rough time check Tower: It's Thursday, Sir.
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

Tower: What's your heigth and position? Pilot: Well, I'm 6 foot tall and I'm sitting front left.
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

As migration approached, two elderly vultures doubted they could make the trip south, so they decided to go by airplane. When they checked their baggage, the attendant noticed that they were carrying two dead raccoons. "Do you wish to check the raccoons through as luggage?" she asked. "No, thanks," replied the vultures. "They're carrion."
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passengers take their seats and get prepared for an emergency landing. A few minutes later, the pilot asked the flight attendants if everyone was buckled in and ready. "All set back here, Captain," came the reply, "except the lawyers are still going around passing out business cards."
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

A blonde gets an opportunity to fly to a nearby country. She has never been on an airplane anywhere and was very excited and tense. As soon as she boarded the plane, a Boeing747, she started jumping in excitement, running over seat to seat and starts shouting, "BOEING! BOEING!! BOEING!!! BO....." She sort of forgets where she is, even the pilot in the cock-pit hears the noise. Annoyed by the goings on, the Pilot comes out and shouts "Be silent!" There was pin-drop silence everywhere and everybody is looking at the blonde and the angry Pilot. She stared at the pilot in silence for a moment, concentrated really hard, and all of a sudden started shouting, "OEING! OEING! OEING! OE...."
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes