Best quotes to send by SMS
Charles Caleb Colton We hate some persons because we do not know them; and we will not know them because we hate them.
Author: Charles Caleb Colton

Susan Jeffers We have been taught to believe that negative equals realistic and positive equals unrealistic.
Author: Susan Jeffers

George Bernard Shaw We have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth without producing it.
Author: George Bernard Shaw

G. K. Chesterton Tradition means giving votes to the most obscure of all classes, our ancestors. It is the democracy of the dead. Tradition refuses to submit to the small and arrogant oligarchy of those who merely happen to be walking about.
Author: G. K. Chesterton

Hubert H. Humphrey It was once said that the moral test of Government is how that Government treats those who are in the dawn of life, the children; those who are in the twilight of life, the elderly; and those who are in the shadows of life, the sick, the needy and the han
Author: Hubert H. Humphrey

The best jokes to send by SMS
Clinton jokes Q: How does Bill Clinton say "I'm about to hurt you"? A: "Trust me."
This is the joke from a category: Clinton jokes

College jokes An applicant was being interviewed for admission to a prominent medical school. "Tell me," inquired the interviewer, "where do you expect to be ten years from now?" "Well, let's see," replied the student. "It's Wednesday afternoon. I guess I'll be on the golf course by now."
This is the joke from a category: College jokes

Cow jokes Q: What do you call cattle with a sense of humor? A: Laughing stock.
This is the joke from a category: Cow jokes

Cowboy jokes The cowboy lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh Amarillo theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this he whispered to the cowboy, "Sorry, sir, but you're only allowed one seat." The cowboy groaned but didn't budge. The usher became more impatient. "Sir, if you don't get up from there, I'm going to have to call the manager. The cowboy just groaned. The usher marched briskly back up the aisle. In a moment he returned with the manager. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move the cowboy, but with no success. Finally, they summoned the police. The cop surveyed the situation briefly then asked, "All right buddy, what's you're name?" "Sam," the cowboy moaned. "Where ya from, Sam?" With pain in his voice Sam replied.... "The balcony."
This is the joke from a category: Cowboy jokes

Criminal jokes Several years ago, Andy was sentenced to prison. During his stay, he got along well with the guards and all his fellow inmates. The warden saw that deep down, Andy was a good person and made arrangements for Andy to learn a trade while doing his time. After three years, Andy was recognized as one of the best carpenters in the local area. Often he would be given a weekend pass to do odd jobs for the citizens of the community.... and he always reported back to prison before Sunday night was over. The warden was thinking of remodeling his kitchen and in fact had done much of the work himself. But he lacked the skills to build a set of kitchen cupboards and a large counter top which he had promised his wife. So he called Andy into his office and asked him to complete the job for him. But, alas, Andy refused. He told the warden, "Gosh, I'd really like to help you but counter fitting is what got me into prison in the first place".
This is the joke from a category: Criminal jokes