The trick is not how much pain you feel - but how much joy you feel. Any idiot can feel pain. Life is full of excuses to feel pain, excuses not to live, excuses, excuses, excuses.
Author: Erica Jong

The trouble with being poor is that it takes up all of your time.
Author: Willem de Kooning

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.
Author: Terry Pratchett

Live Free Or Die; Death Is Not The Worst Of Evils.
Author: General John Stark

Judgement, not passion should prevail.
Author: Epicharmus

The lifeguard told the mother to make her young son stop urinating in the pool. "Everyone knows," the mother lectured him, "that from time to time, young children will urinate in a pool." "Oh really?" said the lifeguard, "from the diving board!?!?"
This is the joke from a category: Parent jokes

What do young ghosts call their parents? Deady and Mummy.
This is the joke from a category: Parent jokes

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk, and the next Twenty-four years telling them to sit down and shut up!
This is the joke from a category: Parent jokes

"Can I go outside and watch the solar eclipse?" asked Rupert. "Okay," replied his father, "but don't stand too close."
This is the joke from a category: Parent jokes

"Dad, why do you write so slow?" asked Dennis. "I have to," replied his father. "I'm a slow reader."
This is the joke from a category: Parent jokes