Best Cell Phones

Faith, as well intentioned as it may be, must be built on facts, not fiction--faith in fiction is a damnable false hope.
Author: Thomas A. Edison

Fall seven times, stand up eight.
Author: Japanese Proverb

Fame lost its appeal for me when I went into a public restroom and an autograph seeker handed me a pen and paper under the stall door.
Author: Marlo Thomas

Famous remarks are very seldom quoted correctly.
Author: Simeon Strunsky

Far from idleness being the root of all evil, it is rather the only true good.
Author: Soren Kierkegaard

A Texan, a Russian, and a New Yorker go into a restaurant in London. ''Excuse me, but if you wanted the steak you might not get one as there is a shortage due to the mad cow disease,'' says the waiter. The Texan says, ''What's a shortage?'' The Russian says, ''What's a steak?'' The New Yorker says, ''What's excuse me?''
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

There were three men working at the top of a building. One was Chinese, one was Mexican, and the other one was Polish. At lunch they went to the edge and the top of the building the Mexican guy pulled out a taco and he said if I get another taco I am gonna jump off this bulding tomorrow. The Chinese guy pulled out fried rice and said if I get fried rice tomorrow I'm gonna jump off with you. The Polish guy pulled out a ham sanwich and said if I get another ham sandwich I'm gonna jump tomorrow with you guys too. The next day the Mexican guy got a taco so he jumped off. The Chinese guy got fried rice so he jumped off. The Polish guy got a ham sandwich so hey jumped off the building. The next day their wives had a triple funeral and the Mexican guy's wife was crying and she said I could have made him a burrito or something. The Chinese guy's wife was cring and said I could have made him some sushi. Th e Polish guy's wife couldn't stop laughing. The other's asked what was so funny? She stopped for a second and said that he had always made his own lunch.
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

Q: What do you call Italian women in a sauna? A: Gorillas In The Mist!
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

One night, God spoke to a preacher to tell him what he wanted him to do. After God had briefed him on his mission, the minister decided to ask him a question. "God," he said, "What is heaven like?" God replied, "Well, normally I don't tell people this, but since you are my servant, I guess I can tell you. Heaven will be like a city. It will have the best of everything. For example, the French will be the chefs; the Italians will be the lovers; the English will be the policeman; the Germans will be the mechanics; and the Dutch will be the politicians!" The man looked pleased. "What is hell like?" he asked. "Well," he said with a sigh, "the French will be the mechanics; the Italians will be the politicians; the English will be the chefs; the Germans will be the policemen; and the Dutch will be the lovers."
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

A French guy, an American guy and a Cuban guy are standing on a cliff. The French guy throws a case of fine wine off the cliff. ''Why did you do that?''asked the other men. ''We have plenty of fine wine in France,'' said the man. Next, the Cuban guy throws a box of fine cigars off the cliff. ''Why did you do that?'' asked the other men. ''We have plenty of cigars in Cuba,'' said the Cuban man. Finally, the American man pickes up the Cuban man and throw' him off the cliff. ''What did you do that for?'' asked the French man. ''We have plenty of Cubans in America,'' answered the American man.
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes