One day President Roosevelt told me that he was asking publicly for suggestions about what the war should be called. I said at once 'The Unnecessary War'.
Author: Sir Winston Churchill

Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist.
Author: G. K. Chesterton

The question is not, can they reason? Nor, can they talk? But, can they suffer?
Author: Jeremy Bentham

The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out the conservative adopts them.
Author: Mark Twain

The real distinction is between those who adapt their purposes to reality and those who seek to mold reality in the light of their purposes.
Author: Henry Kissinger

What do you do with a green monster? Put it in the sun until it ripens!
This is the joke from a category: Monster jokes

What do you call a huge, ugly, slobbering, furry monster with cotton wool in his ears? Anything you like ? he can't hear you.
This is the joke from a category: Monster jokes

What's the difference between a dim monster and a birthday candle? The candle is a thousand times brighter!
This is the joke from a category: Monster jokes

Why is stupid monster like a jack-o'-lantern? They both have empty heads.
This is the joke from a category: Monster jokes

Why did the monster get a ticket at Thanksgiving dinner? He was exceeding the feed limit!
This is the joke from a category: Monster jokes