Best quotes to send by SMS

The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.
Author: William Shakespeare
The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer.
Author: Victor Borge
The duke had a mind that ticked like a clock and, like a clock, it regularly went cuckoo.
Author: Terry Pratchett
The emotional, sexual, and psychological stereotyping of females begins when the doctor says, 'It's a girl.'
Author: Shirley Chisholm
I am against using death as a punishment. I am also against using it as a reward.
Author: Stanislaw J. Lec
The best jokes to send by SMS

Have you seen www.indecisive.com?
Yes and
no.
This is the joke from a category: Internet jokes
Have you seen
www.quicksand.com?
Yes,
but it hasn't sunk in yet.
This is the joke from a category: Internet jokes
Have you seen www.apathy.com?
No, and
quite honestly I can't be bothered.
This is the joke from a category: Internet jokes
Have you seen www.dustbin.com?
Yes, but
it's a load of rubbish.
This is the joke from a category: Internet jokes
PE Teacher: Why did you kick that ball
straight at the school computer?
Pupil: You told me to put it in the
Net.
This is the joke from a category: Internet jokes