Some people have so much respect for their superiors they have none left for themselves.
Author: Peter McArthur

Some people will never learn anything because they understand everything too soon.
Author: Alexander Pope

Some things you do because you want to. Some things you do because of the needs of others in your family.
Author: Real Live Preacher

Someday we'll look back on this moment and plow into a parked car.
Author: Evan Davis

Sometimes a good exit is all you can ask for.
Author: Sean Stewart

One Halloween this woman opens her door to find the most adorable little girl, with golden blond curly hair and the biggest blue eyes. She was dressed as an Angel, and was just delightful. The woman said, "what are you supposed to say sweetheart?" The little girl looks up at the woman and says "Twick or Tweat!" The woman thinks this is just adorable, and she calls her husband to come to the door. The woman say to the child, "Go ahead honey say it just one more time." Once again the little Angel looks up and says, "Twick or Tweat!" The husband agrees with his wife, this little Angel is just the cutest thing. The woman picks an apple from the Treat Bowl, shines it up with her apron, and drops it into the little girl's Treat Bag. The little Angel looks in her bag then looks up at the woman and says, "Thanks a lot lady, you just broke my f**king cookies!"
This is the joke from a category: Halloween jokes

What happened when the girl dressed as a spoon left the Halloween party ? No one moved. They couldn't stir without her.
This is the joke from a category: Halloween jokes

Why were the trick-or-treaters wearing grass skirts? Because it was Hulaween!
This is the joke from a category: Halloween jokes

What is a childs's favourite type of Halloween candy? Lots a candy.
This is the joke from a category: Halloween jokes

Why aren't burgers the least bit scared of Halloween? They're used to people 'goblin' them!
This is the joke from a category: Halloween jokes