Best quotes to send by SMS
Garry Shandling I have such poor vision I can date anybody.
Author: Garry Shandling

Terry Pratchett The consensus seemed to be that if really large numbers of men were sent to storm the mountain, then enough might survive the rocks to take the citadel. This is essentially the basis of all military thinking.
Author: Terry Pratchett

Lois McMaster Bujold Never... ever suggest they don't have to pay you. What they pay for, they'll value. What they get for free, they'll take for granted, and then demand as a right. Hold them up for all the market will bear.
Author: Lois McMaster Bujold

Nathaniel Emmons Just definitions either prevent or put an end to a dispute.
Author: Nathaniel Emmons

William J. Broad The crux... is that the vast majority of the mass of the universe seems to be missing.
Author: William J. Broad

The best jokes to send by SMS
Insect jokes How do fireflies start a race? Ready, steady, glow!
This is the joke from a category: Insect jokes

Insect jokes What insect lives on nothing? A moth, because it eats holes.
This is the joke from a category: Insect jokes

Insect jokes Why are mosquitoes annoying? Because they get under your skin.
This is the joke from a category: Insect jokes

Insect jokes Q: What did the Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant? A: "Dead ant, Dead Ant ... Dead ant, Dead Ant .. Dead Ant" (to the tune of Pink Panther theme).
This is the joke from a category: Insect jokes

Internet jokes How does the vicar explore the Internet? With the church mouse.
This is the joke from a category: Internet jokes