
There are many ways of breaking a heart. Stories were full of hearts broken by love, but what really broke a heart was taking away its dream - whatever that dream might be.
Author: Pearl Buck
Keep five yards from a carriage, ten yards from a horse, and a hundred yards from an elephant; but the distance one should keep from a wicked man cannot be measured.
Author: Indian Proverb
If you were in a burning house and there was a cat and a Rembrandt, what would you save? The cat...you would save the cat, because the cat is alive. The art is dead. It's just paint on a canvas, ink on a page. To live for art is to deny life. It's just to
Author: Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider
I don't have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They're upstairs in my socks.
Author: Groucho Marx
There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating: people who know absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing.
Author: Oscar Wilde

A local law enforcement officer stops a car for
traveling
faster than
the posted speed limit. Since he's in a
good mood that day he decides
to give the poor fellow a break and
write him out a warning instead of
a
ticket. So, he asks the man
his name.
"Fred," he replies. Fred what?" the officer asks. "Just
Fred," the
man responds.
When the officer presses him for a last
name, the man tells him that
he used to have a last name but lost it.
The officer thinks he has a
nut
case on his hands but plays along
with it.
"Tell me Fred, how did you lose your last name?"
The man
replies, "It's a long story so stay with me. I was born
Fred
Dingaling. I know, funny last name. The kids used to tease me all the
time.
So I stayed to myself. I studied hard and got good grades. When I
got
older I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. I went through
college,
medical school, internship, residency, finally got my
degree, so I was
Fred Dingaling, MD.
After a while I got bored
being a doctor so I decided to go back to
school. Dentistry was my
dream. Got all the way through school, got
my degree so I was now
Fred Dingaling MD DDS. I got bored doing
dentistry so I started fooling
around with my assistant. She gave me
VD.
So, I was Fred
Dingaling MD DDS with VD. Well, the ADA found out
about the VD so they took
away my DDS so I was Fred Dingaling MD
with VD. Then the AMA found
out about the ADA taking away my DDS
because of the VD, so they took
away my MD leaving me as
Fred Dingaling with VD. Then the VD took
away my dingaling so now
I'm just Fred."
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes
The police are looking for a
thief with one
eye
Why don't they use two?
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes
"I'll have to report you, sir," said the
traffic cop
to the speeding driver. "You were doing 85 miles an hour."
"Nonsense,
officer," declared the driver. "I've only been in the
car for ten
minutes."
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes
Police Chief: Why are you
putting handcuffs
on that building?
Officer: I'm making a house arrest
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes
Veronica was
practicing the piano when
suddenly there was a loud pounding on the
front door. She opened it and
found a breathless cop.
"What's the matter?!" she asked.
"Where's the body?!" demanded the officer.
"What are you
talking about?"
"We just got a tip that some guy named Mozart was
being murdered in
this house."
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes