Best quotes to send by SMS
Pearl Buck There are many ways of breaking a heart. Stories were full of hearts broken by love, but what really broke a heart was taking away its dream - whatever that dream might be.
Author: Pearl Buck

Indian Proverb Keep five yards from a carriage, ten yards from a horse, and a hundred yards from an elephant; but the distance one should keep from a wicked man cannot be measured.
Author: Indian Proverb

Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider If you were in a burning house and there was a cat and a Rembrandt, what would you save? The cat...you would save the cat, because the cat is alive. The art is dead. It's just paint on a canvas, ink on a page. To live for art is to deny life. It's just to
Author: Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider

Groucho Marx I don't have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They're upstairs in my socks.
Author: Groucho Marx

Oscar Wilde There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating: people who know absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing.
Author: Oscar Wilde

The best jokes to send by SMS
Police jokes A local law enforcement officer stops a car for traveling faster than the posted speed limit. Since he's in a good mood that day he decides to give the poor fellow a break and write him out a warning instead of a ticket. So, he asks the man his name. "Fred," he replies. Fred what?" the officer asks. "Just Fred," the man responds. When the officer presses him for a last name, the man tells him that he used to have a last name but lost it. The officer thinks he has a nut case on his hands but plays along with it. "Tell me Fred, how did you lose your last name?" The man replies, "It's a long story so stay with me. I was born Fred Dingaling. I know, funny last name. The kids used to tease me all the time. So I stayed to myself. I studied hard and got good grades. When I got older I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. I went through college, medical school, internship, residency, finally got my degree, so I was Fred Dingaling, MD. After a while I got bored being a doctor so I decided to go back to school. Dentistry was my dream. Got all the way through school, got my degree so I was now Fred Dingaling MD DDS. I got bored doing dentistry so I started fooling around with my assistant. She gave me VD. So, I was Fred Dingaling MD DDS with VD. Well, the ADA found out about the VD so they took away my DDS so I was Fred Dingaling MD with VD. Then the AMA found out about the ADA taking away my DDS because of the VD, so they took away my MD leaving me as Fred Dingaling with VD. Then the VD took away my dingaling so now I'm just Fred."
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes

Police jokes The police are looking for a thief with one eye Why don't they use two?
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes

Police jokes "I'll have to report you, sir," said the traffic cop to the speeding driver. "You were doing 85 miles an hour." "Nonsense, officer," declared the driver. "I've only been in the car for ten minutes."
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes

Police jokes Police Chief: Why are you putting handcuffs on that building? Officer: I'm making a house arrest
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes

Police jokes Veronica was practicing the piano when suddenly there was a loud pounding on the front door. She opened it and found a breathless cop. "What's the matter?!" she asked. "Where's the body?!" demanded the officer. "What are you talking about?" "We just got a tip that some guy named Mozart was being murdered in this house."
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes